WEEK 103 - ONLY the BEGINNING

...I can't believe it. It's actually over. These past two years—which once seemed to be an eternity and a half—have come and gone in the blink of an eye. Now, here we are on my last day in the mission field. Who could've possibly imagined this incredible journey I set off on could come and go so very quickly? Of course, nearly everyone I talked to throughout my mission warned me of this, and to a degree I believed and understood them. It was the same thing with high school and any marching band season I went through. But, for some reason, I felt as though my tenure as a servant of the Lord would last longer—that the end would never really come. And yet, here it is, with me only but a few hours left as the young Elder Z.S.Weber.

 As this realization hit me between the eyes like a charging bull, I couldn't help but look back over this past week and wonder if what I did during my mission—during these oh so short twenty-three months—was enough. I am in no way perfect, and throughout this mission I have made some mistakes. Some days I didn't work as hard as I should. I didn't consecrate my all to the Lord. I would be lazy, stubborn, prideful, and almost anything else that would keep me from giving everything I had to the work. I have thought of this often throughout the week, and while the joys of my successes as a missionary were bright and bold, my shortcomings filled me with worry and anxiety, a fear that I hadn't done all I should.

That's where Friday—and the temple trip I had been waiting for—met me, with all my anxieties and worries winding me up tight. They rode the long drive down from Loveland to Denver with me, never losing their grip on my mind even for a second. I felt immensely relieved when we finally reached the temple. The peace of the temple was wonderful, but it did not erase my fears. I felt them, nagging at the back of my head throughout my time in the temple. It filled me with worry, and as I sat there I would find myself wondering if my inadequacies, my mistakes, would make me unfit to remain in the building. Even worse, I wondered if they would even go so far as to close me off from the blessings of Heaven.

This lasted throughout my time in the temple until I finally reached the celestial room. For those that don't know, the celestial room in the temple is made to represent the highest kingdom in our Father's Heaven. It is the most beautiful place in the entire building—indeed, no matter the building, it is always the most beautiful place in the world, and the Spirit of the Lord can be felt very strongly there. It is a place to go to when in need of divine guidance and direction, when doubt needs to be dispelled and fear and anxiety erased. Such was my sorry state as I sat in that beautiful room. I felt compelled to ask our Father Himself what He thought of me and the work I had done on my mission. Had I failed Him, or was He proud of me?

Now, normally I do not share the impressions or truth I receive from my time in the temple of my Lord. However, after thinking over these past few days, I have been impressed to share this message with you today.

I didn't get my answer right away, but as doubt attempted another frontal assault on my mind, I felt a thought take center stage. "Read the Book of Mormon. You know where to go to." It was the Spirit, no denying it. And, he was right. I did know where I needed to look for support. So, I grabbed one of the copies of the Book of Mormon that were sitting in the room. I turned to the Book of Alma, Chapter 38, when Alma is teaching his son Shiblon. This is what I read.

"And now, my son, I trust that I shall have great joy in you, because of your steadiness and your faithfulness unto God; for as you have commenced in your youth to look to the Lord your God, even so I hope that you will continue in keeping his commandments; for blessed is he that endureth to the end...I know that thou wast in bonds; yea, and I also know that thou wast stoned for the word’s sake; and thou didst bear all these things with patience because the Lord was with thee; and now thou knowest that the Lord did deliver thee." (Alma 38:2, 4)

These words brought some comfort to my mind. I have always felt a close association to the sons of Alma the Younger. Each, I feel, I can relate to in some degree. I honestly would not be surprised if I had been friends with them in the Premortal Existence. And this time, from Shiblon, I felt the comforting hand of the Lord resting upon and telling me that, no, I didn't do everything that I could, but that which I did do He was proud of me for. I could have done better, but as I began to worry over the 'what ifs', my eyes caught another scripture, also written to Shiblon, that comforted me again.

"And now, as ye have begun to teach the word even so I would that ye should continue to teach; and I would that ye would be diligent and temperate in all things. See that ye are not lifted up unto pride; yea, see that ye do not boast in your own wisdom, nor of your much strength. Use boldness, but not overbearance; and also see that ye bridle all your passions, that ye may be filled with love; see that ye refrain from idleness." (Alma 38:10-12)

Those words struck me from the crown of my head to the tips of my toes. In my mind I could feel the Spirit realigning my thoughts in a way I could understand. In effect, I felt, or heard, the voice of the Lord in my mind saying, "Elder Weber, the past is in the past. Let it go. I don't care about what you did or didn't do on your mission. Not any more. I care about you. I care about the man you have become, and the spirit that resides within you. Have you grown and changed from who you were when you left South Jordan two years ago? If so, then that's all you really need to know. Don't be weighed down by the past. Learn from it, and make the rest of your life even greater than you could ever fathom."

As I felt those words rush through my mind, I came to understand. Yes, I have a lot to work on still. But, so does everyone else. My mission wasn't set up to make me perfect for when I come back home. If it was, every missionary I have served with would fail in that. But it gave me something to work with, a new identity that I can run with for the rest of my life. My work isn't done here. I have a long way to go yet, and I'm ready for it. I have my Father by my side, my Lord on the other, and their angels all about me to bear me up. I have family and friends who are ready for me to come home, and willing to help me out. For this, I truly am thankful.

I started this email by saying that I felt as though my mission never truly would end. I was right. Remember that in the beginning of that second quote I gave that Alma's counsel to his son Shiblon is to continue teaching as he has hitherto been teaching. If you wouldn't mind, I would like to quote some words written by a famous writer in the fantasy world. Speaking as one of his most popular characters, he wrote, "And so my tale ends—do I dare to say?...I am young, I must remind myself...And for all my present contentment, the world remains a dangerous place...Do I dare to believe my story is fully told? I think not." (R.A.Salvatore, Sojourn)

Brothers and sisters, the work continues to press onward. It doesn't end when we take the name tags off and the mantle of a full-time missionary is lifted from our shoulders. There is yet much work to be done, and it will not end until the Lord Himself appears before us and says, as He did almost two-thousand years ago, "it is finished." So we need to get to work. There is much to be done, among both the living and our dead and departed. Every man, every woman, every being that can do this work must come together in harmony. We have friends to help, burdens to ease, callings to fulfill, and families to nurture. We have relatives that are waiting for the blessings we cherish. Do not hold back in the service we can give, for it is the greatest service to be given since the very foundation of this earth. Indeed, it is the service this earth was made for.

Is our journey over?

I dare say not.

In fact, this is only the beginning.

This I say in the sacred name of our Lord and Savior, even Jesus Christ, Amen.

—Elder Z.S.Weber

WEEK 102 - OF YOUNG and OLD CROWS

Good Morning, my dear friends and family back home. Sorry, again, for sending this big email out later than usual. Once more, yesterday was a very rough day, and between doctor's appointments, haircuts, lunch, and shopping, there wasn't a whole lot of time for us to be able to email everyone on our lists. Well, better late than never, am I right? To be honest, though, I am glad for the extra time these extra twenty-four hours gave me, as I really didn't know what to talk about this week. I mean, there wasn't a whole lot that stood out in these past seven days, and it was difficult to form a message from these fleeting moments.

But a message I have for you indeed.

While not a whole lot happened this week, there were two major things at the very beginning of the week that were really great moments for me. The first was interviews with President McMurray. Me and Elder Pember were President's fourth and third missionaries he interviewed that day, and when it came my turn I was feeling very prepared for the information he would give me. You see, as last week was my second-to-last week in the mission, this interview was to be what is infamously known in the mission as the departing interview. The interview is around an hour long, as to allow the mission president enough time to offer the advice the missionary most needs.

As with all interviews I've had while on the mission, it was a great moment for me in seeing how far I've come and how much farther I have to go. Throughout the interview, President McMurray asked me how my mission had gone, and in what ways I felt I had been successful through it. It gave me a great chance to look back on my past and see how I really have grown and progressed over this mission. He then asked me about my plans I have set for after the mission (school down at SUU, try to date a lot more than I did in high school, get first book published) and offered some advice on how to attain those goals while keeping myself strengthened in the church and any callings I receive.

Best of all, he told me that we will be going to the temple on the 29th, Friday this week! I get to go through one last time! Yes!!

The second major point from this week was having the chance to go on exchanges. This exchange was very interesting for me, as it was my first time going on exchanges with a greenie. And I'm talking like just an eight-day-old greenie. His name was Elder Brand, and he is Elder Anderson's greenie and companion for the rest of this transfer. To be honest, I was a little worried about how to spend our few hours together. What I was really worried about was somehow messing up and having this one moment so early in Elder Brand's mission reshape everything in how he went about the work. This fear grew even more when I actually went out working with him and came to realize that he is incredibly prepared for the work.

However, regardless of my worries, the exchange went really well. Elder Brand was a great missionary to serve with, even if it was only for a day or so, and he really shows great potential as a powerful missionary. As missionaries, we often talk about praying and reading the Book of Mormon with real intent, with a true desire to learn and then apply whatever we gain from Heavenly Father. It was wonderful to come to know a missionary that so fully accepts that real intent, who knows that he is very much still imperfect and is willing to do whatever his Father in Heaven asks him to do in order to improve. It was a moment where I was able to see the future of the Colorado Fort Collins Mission, and how brightly does it shine.

From these two moments, I have also come to love the old poem President Boyd K. Packer recited in a General Conference address in October of 2011.

"The old crow is getting slow.

The young crow is not.

Of what the young crow does not know

The old crow knows a lot.

At knowing things the old crow

Is still the young crow’s master.

What does the slow old crow not know?

—How to go faster.

The young crow flies above, below,

And rings around the slow old crow.

What does the fast young crow not know?

—Where to go." (Fast and Slow, John Ciardi)

As a missionary about to go back out into the insane world we live in today (and indeed, this is an insane world we live in), I am able to experience both sides of this poem. With President Brown, and now President McMurray, I have been very much the young crow. I feel ready to go home, to get on with my life, to start living that phase of life I've dreamed of living for years. However, the old wise crows know best the struggles I will face, and are quick to offer advice to the young crow so that he doesn't end up messing up along the way. Their words have always been the counsel and direction I needed, both as a missionary and a young man.

On the other end of the poem, though, by missionary standards I am very much an old crow. And, some days, I feel it. I lack the zeal and 'greenie fire' that I once had when I was a bright-eyed-bushy-tailed greenie almost two years ago. I work hard and do what I can, yet some days it doesn't feel as though it was enough to get the job done. All around me are young crows (I live with three of them now). Lively and excitable, they zip this way and that, eager to do to the work and do that which they have been called to do. With so many missionaries with so much more energy and zeal to do the work, what place has the old crow among them?

Well, you read the poem. I have an additional year's worth of experience over my three roommates here. While I'm not the wisest or the smartest, this experience helps me much when teaching and relating to our investigators. These pearls of wisdom that I have gained on my mission are something I hope to hold on to for the rest of my life.

Now, I am certain there are some among you that are wondering, "This is all very well and good, Elder Weber, but where are you going with this?" My brothers and sisters, each of us are old and young crows. Never doubt it, we all are like the young crow in some way or another, eager to go out, to go this way and that, to live life. And, at the same time, we are all old crows, each having experience that can benefit one another. The question then is not whether we have to learn more or be more zealous in our desires, but how we can improve. How can we make our lack of knowledge (for the young crow) or our lack or energy (for the old crow) a blessing.

The words of the Lord to Moroni I believe best answer this question. "And if men come unto me I will show unto them their weakness. I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them." (Ether 12:27)

Brothers and sisters, we are all imperfect. Each of us lack, in some way or another, when compared to our Heavenly a Parents and our Savior. However, if we are humble enough to accept their help and guidance, and the help and guidance of those around us, then can our 'weak things become strong', and the trials that once stood as great mountains before us will be no more than hurdles to jump over. My friends, my plea is that we all seek this level of humility. Turn to our Father, turn to each other, and see what miracles these young and old crows can work. Thus I bear witness of, in the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.

—Elder Z.S.Weber

WEEK 101 - BLESSINGS of the TEMPLE

Hey everyone! Sorry for such the late email, but yesterday was pretty
rough for me and Elder Pember when it came to emailing. The Zone
Leaders wanted us to carpool with them so that we could save on miles,
which was a great idea...except that they had a VERY long list of
errands to run and emailing their family didn't look to be high on
that list. And, since we've lost access to WiFi in our apartment, our
chances to send and receive emails have been limited to whenever we
have been within access to free WiFi as we're out and about, which
isn't as often as I personally would like. But no matter! The email is
here and ready, so let's get on with the rest of this week!

This week was actually a pretty good week all around, sans the evident
lack of WiFi. Throughout this entire week we've had some great chances
to meet and teach a lot of old and new investigators that we've been
trying to meet with for a while, but it mostly has fallen through for
us. While most ended up just telling us they didn't want to meet with
missionaries any more (in more or less words), there were a couple
that still seemed fairly interested in learning more. And, of course,
once we brought up the soon-to-be-opened temple they got VERY
interested! Which is interesting, because this is the first time I've
really seen people this excited about the temple...and I have two
weeks left.

Perhaps the most memorable of these lessons was with an older couple
we had met with in the past called the Speers. Brother Speer is a
less-active member that hasn't been to church or done anything
church-related in...well, forever is probably a safe estimate. Sister
Speer is a non-member, and though she doesn't mind us missionaries
coming over every once in a while, she has made it clear what she
thinks of organized religion. However, when we brought up the subject
of the temple with them, they were both very interested. Sister Speer,
even had already been looking forward to going through it with some of
her friends!

After discussing how they could be able to get tickets for the
open-house coming up in a few weeks, we decided to explain what we
actually do in the temple, and sort of work in a bit of the Plan of
Salvation, as that is primarily what is going on in the temple.
Anyways, they didn't seem all that interested in what we believe we
can do for our deceased ancestors in the temple (be baptized for them,
be sealed for and to them, help them receive any additional ordinances
and blessings they were unable to receive while on the earth). What
they were very interested it, though, was the Family History work, and
how they could do more. Perhaps, by that angle, there's hope yet for
the Speers to come unto the fold!

The temple has also played a great role in being able to get out and
share the gospel while tracting. It's been very interesting to be able
to witness. Most people, when we go around explaining that we want to
talk about Christ seem to go very ice-cold on us. I mean, honestly!
Why is it that people are just fine talking about Pokemon Go and the
NFL, but the minute religion and Christ are brought up into any
conversation, either half the company gets hostile or they decide to
just walk away or escape? However, if we start talking about the
temple, it's a great ice breaker and conversation starter. Pretty much
everyone in Fort Collins is interested in that beautiful building that
the Mormons are working on!

Case in point, Everett Valenzuela, our newest investigator found
through tracting. Last Tuesday we were out tracting in a small
neighborhood (that apparently is off limits to solicitors and
trespassers, as the very next person we talked to after Everett
pointed out to us so kindly), and after a few unanswered doors we met
this man named Everett who seemed very interested in the temple and
wanted to learn more. We ended up stopping by again that next Saturday
and sharing a message about the temple and how families can be
together forever. We also had a member, Brother Blakely Sr. with us to
help us share our message. In the end it was a great lesson and we
should be meeting with him again sometime next week.

So, yeah, this week has been pretty great, all things considered. And
of course, what made it so special in the end was the temple. I don't
know how I was able to overlook the importance of the temple before my
mission, but it has become very clear to me now. The temple truly is a
holy place, a piece of Heaven on earth. There, the darkness that has
covered the landscape of the world cannot enter. Just stepping onto
the grounds and walking around is like walking into the Garden of Eden
itself. It is peaceful, serene, and unbelievably beautiful. It is a
place of peace, of safety, of comfort and strength, where prayers are
answered and miracles worked.

But it isn't just a peaceful getaway from the rest of the world. As
much as I love the temple for the peace it has brought my heart the
few times I go there, I know that there is a much grander reason to
go. Like an enormous ivory beehive, temples are a grand station of
work and labor. Perhaps it isn't so taxing on the body, but certainly
the work in the temple is taxing on the mind and the spirit, yet it is
some of the most wonderful work and service I have ever done. In the
temple, we have a chance to offer the blessings we have received in
life for our ancestors, and others that have come before us. Those
that missed out on the sweetest of fruits from the tree of life can
have a chance to savor its taste even after their mortal frames have
withered to dust.

As Paul put it in 1 Corinthians, "Else what shall they do which are
baptized for the dead, if the dead rise not at all? why are they then
baptized for the dead?" (1 Corinthians 15:29). We believe that man
will rise from his grave again, given a new, immortal life. Why then
would our perfect, loving Father in Heaven hold back on blessings to
His children that were unable to receive it in life? How would that be
fair? It stands to reason, and makes perfect sense to me, that God
would provide a way to offer these same saving ordinances we receive
on earth to those who never had the chance to enjoy them in life.

This work cannot be done without the living, though. Each of these
ordinances, however spiritual they may be, must be done here on the
physical plane. Therefore, it is our duty, as sons and daughters of
God and the current and rising generations in our family lines, to do
this work. So go to work, by brothers and sisters. Go to the temple,
or ready yourself to go to the temple, and help to offer the blessings
you savor with those that have passed on. As you do, the Lord will
bless you incredibly. Trials that once were mighty against us will be
no more than simple obstacles to overcome, and those blessings we
savor now will become evermore sweet and desirable to the taste.

This I bear my personal witness of, in the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.

—Elder Z.S.Weber

WEEK 100 - THE HOLY PRIESTHOOD

Good morning, my beloved brothers and sisters in the spirit. 'Tis I
once again, the ever-incredible Elder Z.S.Weber, sending off this
email to all y'all back at home in Utah and onward throughout the
world, from this simple apartment that Elder Pember and I have come to
call home. This has been an incredible week, I am happy to say. A lot
has happened this past week, a lot of great things, and so we have a
lot to talk about today. Not only that, but this was also the last
week of my last full transfer on the mission! Yeah, that went by a
little too quick if you ask me. Anyways, just like always, expect some
big changes coming up by the end of this email. All I'm going to say
for now is that my last three weeks on the mission are looking pretty
interesting.

So, without further ado, let's move on to Monday evening of last week.
Yeah, I don't usually jump all the way back to exactly a week ago, but
this was big. After running around on July 4th getting all of our work
done and getting all set and prepared for the coming week, Elder
Pember and I decided to head home so that he could finish up on his
laundry and I could catch a quick nap before we run ourselves into the
ground. Well, while we were in the middle of our resting, the Zone
Leaders popped in. Still don't know why they were in before 9, when
we're supposed to be home, but they seemed noticeably annoyed that we
were. Not wanting to start a fight (or say something I would regret,
as I often do when very, very tired), we headed out once more.

After driving around for a bit (mostly to help me cool down and think
clearly) we came to a stop and looked at our lists to see if there was
anyone that stood out for us to visit. There was—Thomas Rooney, a
self-referral. Now, I've dealt with self-referrals before, but this
guy was nothing like those guys. Tom was very serious about learning
more about the church, and was actually the one that brought up
baptism in our conversation, and what he would need to do so that he
would be eligible to be baptized. We left him a Book of Mormon, a King
James Version of the Bible (the only version I'll ever accept!), and
one of our temple pass-along cards for the new temple coming up.
Unfortunately, he'll have to be referred to the Zone Leaders, as he is
YSA age, but still! Awesome way to end the day!

Up until Friday, the rest of the week was a big blur. I do remember
going on exchanges with our District Leader's companion, Elder
Marchetti, as well as going to the doctor with Elder Pember (he was
the one going in, I was the one in the lobby waiting). However, Friday
was when things definitely got interesting. Allow me to set the scene
for you.


It was the early afternoon in Fort Collins, Colorado, and Elder Pember
and I had just finished a great lunch and were settling down at the
library to do our weekly planning. We had gotten through the first few
goals for our coming week (just about two or three) when we got a call
from the Zone Leaders asking us to come to the apartment ASAP. When we
asked them why, all they said was to just come and not to ask
questions. With those vague answers, Elder Pember and I drove all the
way back to the apartment, all the while thinking up all of the
possible worst-case-scenarios that would be reason to call us up
("They found my secret stash of Magic cards!" "They found out about us
playing D&D with the other Elders on P-Day!" "They want me to be a
District Leader/Trainer for my last three weeks!").

Of course, it was none of these worries of ours. Instead, it turned
out that Elder Jackson, our quirky Canadian Zone Leader, had been
chosen by President McMurray to be the new Assistant to the President
(AP), and so the other AP's (Elder Pratt and Elder Miner) were there
to pick him up so that he could get the gist of what it takes to be an
AP before he officially has to replace Elder Pratt as the AP. However,
because he was being whisked away so suddenly, Elder Fraser wasn't
going to have a companion to stay with for four days. So, until
Transfer Day rolled around for us, Elder Fraser was going to be the
third person in my first-ever tripanionship! Took me 23 months, but I
finally got myself a tripanionship!

Now, because we were with the Zone Leader, we had a lot of chances to
teach the discussions. I'm going to just say they have an advantage,
as they are teaching people who are already interested in making
changes in their lives (college students with all the horizon to
them). However, it was a wonderful chance to go out and teach so many
people, especially those that were on the road towards baptism. There
were a few, I will admit, that I found myself wondering 'why are you
holding yourself back?', which is one of the most frustrating things
out there. To see fellow children of God, so filled with a brightness
of light and hope, holding themselves back from the fullness of the
truth...it gets frustrating. However, it was a great experience, and
helped to light some further fire of desire in my heart.

Finally, the greatest thing that happened this week was on Saturday
and Sunday. You all should know about Kathy by now. Well, after
probably about eight weeks of working with Kathy and her husband,
Ralph, we finally made it to her baptism. It was a wonderful
experience, one filled with the Spirit surrounding us. Elder Pember
was the one to baptize her. After she was baptized, both she and Ralph
bore powerful witnesses of the truth of this gospel, and how thankful
they were to be able to be a part of it now. 

The next day, during
Sacrament Meeting, I was able to be the one to confirm Kathy a member
of the Church, and offer her the gift of the Holy Ghost. That moment,
I just felt this overwhelming feeling that this is why I am out on my
mission.

As for transfers, there is a lot that is changing here in the Fort
Collins Zone. Don't worry, me and Elder Pember are still together, and
still living with the Zone Leaders (as far as our knowledge goes).
However, there are some changes to note. Those of you who remember
Elder 'Morty' Mortensen from my Boulder days might be interested to
know that he is soon to be Elder Swann's new companion in the Harmony
Ward. Elder Anderson, our District Leader, is soon to be a 'father',
training one of the sixteen new missionaries coming in on Wednesday.
Elder Pratt, also, is coming into our Zone, serving as one of the
District Leaders, and he too is going to be a 'father'. Our new Zone
Leader, Elder Domnikov, is sounding to be a great missionary, too. So,
all-in-all, it's looking like next transfer is going to be a great
one, and a great three weeks to close out my mission!

So, that was what all happened this past week. Like I said, this was a
great week, and a great send off to the end of my last full transfer
on the mission. Now, from such a great week as this, I'm certain you
wonder what Spiritual Thought I have to share.

This week, I wish to bear my testimony on the Restoration of the
Priesthood. The Priesthood is the power of God given unto men to speak
and act in His name. It gives them the right and authority to do such
grand things as: summoning ten terrible plagues and unleashing them on
the foes of God; allowing a handful of meal and a little oil to last a
small family through a three-year drought; healing a man born blind so
that he might see; calming a fierce storm while out on the seas; and
feeding a congregation of five-thousand with only five loaves and two
fishes. These great and mighty miracles, and many more, are the work
of the priesthood, and the power of God given to man.

But the Priesthood isn't just the power to work miracles. Though great
that power is, the Priesthood offers us a greater, and far more
important, power and authority. It is only through the power and
authority of the Priesthood that the marvelous work of God can press
forward. When the last of the Apostles were killed after Christ's
resurrection, that authority to direct God's work and lead His people
was taken from the earth. Even if there were many men that desired to
follow God and further His work (which, yes there were), they did not
have the proper authority to do that work, and certainly not in His
name. Therefore, it was entirely necessary that the Priesthood must be
restored to the earth.

With the Restoration of the Gospel to the earth through Joseph Smith
came the Restoration of the Priesthood. Now, in this day and age, we
have been blessed by the presence of the Priesthood in our Church and
in our homes. As a missionary, it has been my honor to be able to
wield this holy Priesthood. It has given me the authority to teach
others the gospel of Jesus Christ, to go out and bring more of my
fellow spirit siblings back unto Him. I have had many chances to bless
others with this Priesthood and be the recipient of many great
blessings. And someday in the not-too-distant future, it will be my
honor to wield this power in righteousness as the Priesthood leader of
my family.

To put it into the words of a modern-day prophet, a man who uses the
priesthood entrusted to him righteously "will find his life sweetened,
his discernment sharpened to decide quickly between right and wrong,
his feelings tender and compassionate, yet his spirit strong and
valiant in defense of right; he will find the priesthood a never
failing source of happiness—a well of living water springing up unto
eternal life." (David O. McKay, October General Conference 1965) This
I bear my personal witness of, in the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.

—Elder Z.S.Weber

WEEK 99 - THE IMPORTANCE of FAMILY

Good morning, 'Merica, and Happy Independence Day to you! This is your favorite Mormon Missionary from the Colorado Fort Collins Mission, Elder Z.S.Weber, here with another one of my weekly updates on how the mission life is going. Now, I know a lot of you are hoping for some epic success story from this week, but sadly this week was just another average week for me and Elder Pember. Nothing too rough happened, but nothing very noteworthy happened either, at least when it comes to the work. We had some great moments of bonding, working in our area, as rough as it might be. However, we haven't seen a whole lot of success, or rather, progress during this past week.

That being said, there were several moments throughout this past week that are worth mentioning. Perhaps we didn't have much progress with our work this past week, but that doesn't mean that this past week wasn't one filled with stirring and inspiring moments of spiritual growth and knowledge.

To start off with, let's go back to Tuesday of this past week, and may I apologize for a slightly somber beginning. Last week, we learned that the son of one of the members of the Prairie Ridge Ward has passed away. It was a shock and pain for the whole family. To help alleviate their troubles, in however small or grand a way as possible, Elder Pember and I went over to the Church Building Monday night and Tuesday morning to help out in the preparations for the funeral. On Tuesday morning, we were asked to help in the catering, carrying the food out for the luncheon and making certain that the tables were all cared for. It was a bit confusing work at first, but it went along well, and I think both Elder Pember and I enjoyed it fairly well.

What had been most surprising for me, though, was how many people had decided to show up. The family had told us that they were only expecting about a hundred people to show up, and in fact had only invited around that many people. When we showed up to help that morning, however, the Church parking lot was close to over-flowing. There was even an entire row of parking spots completely filled by a gang of motorcycles, owned by a group of friends the son of the family had hung out with in the past. It was truly moving to see so many people come together in love, comfort, and compassion in the wake of this tragedy. For a moment, it made me think of how my funeral, at some hopefully very distant date, would go, and who would come to remember me.

Our week pressed on to Thursday, where we had another chance to go and teach Kathy, our soon-to-be-recent-convert. At first, we weren't certain what we would share with her and her husband, Ralph. We ended up deciding to read Alma 34 with them, and discuss the importance of the atonement that is mentioned in the chapter. As we discussed, Ralph brought up a point that was very interesting...one that I have never heard before now. A problem that he was having was that it was difficult for him to believe that God and Jesus Christ were perfect beings. It didn't make much sense to him, as he had experienced a lot of life, and seeing how imperfect and rather corrupt humans can be, that he had a very hard time believing a perfect God could or would create such an imperfect world.

Much to our surprise, though, it was Kathy that had a large role in helping explain this truth to Ralph. Using the knowledge that she had gained from our lessons on the Plan of Salvation and the Gospel of Jesus Christ, she was able to rather confidently state her belief on the fact that God is perfect. It was really surprising to watch, especially as someone who started teaching her when she had very little understanding of the church and of the Plan of Salvation. It was a really wonderful moment to sit there and see that our efforts had paid off. The spirit truly had been with us when we had taught Kathy, and our lessons with her had not merely entertained or informed her, but helped her to change and convert. It was incredible.

Finally, at the close of our week, we felt a heavy loss. This past Thursday evening, President Kelly Brown, the mission president I have had since I first entered my mission, returned home with honor with his beloved wife beside him. Those of us who had come to love President Brown felt a pang of sadness, which was only comforted by the knowledge that we would meet again someday...especially after he had passed on to us his contact information so we could at least attempt to stay in touch after the mission. In his place came our new mission president, President Shawn McMurray, who came fresh and ready to work in this mission and bring it to a new level of greatness.

We had a chance to meet President McMurray on Saturday. It was interesting, getting to meet the new head of the mission. He's certainly no President Brown. He's less intimidating, not quite as giant a man. Yet he has this peaceful spirit about him that President Brown had also. This spirit has been a confirmation to me that he has been given the priesthood keys to lead this mission, and whatever work he is called on to do that it will be the will of God for us missionaries here. While I will only be with him for a few short weeks (four, to be exact), I look forward to learning whatever I can from him and how he runs the mission. If nothing else, it will make for a very interesting and memorable last month of the mission.

And, well...that was my week. Like I said before, not a lot of great new progress, but a great week nonetheless. Spiritually uplifting, filled with great memories, a great week through and through. So, what Spiritual Moment could I have to share this week?

A while back in my mission, one of my former companions received an email from his parents saying that they were moving into Colorado due to some changes in his father's company. Instantly, this companion of mine began to feel slight animosity towards his parents decision, claiming he didn't want to leave his mission only to come home to Colorado. It wasn't fair was the tune his heart and voice was singing. Now, I knew this companion, and he had only said good of Colorado, while his words regarding his home state were nothing but negative. When I asked him regarding this, he told me that one of the biggest reasons he had left on a mission was to get away from his family. He didn't want to be around them, and so them coming to the state he was coming to love would surely ruin it in his mind. 

This was a mindset that I have never experienced before. Those that have read my past emails, and who know me personally, can attest that I love my family. Indeed, though video games are great and the new movies that came out during my mission had me banging my head against the wall in irritation that I couldn't watch them, it was the fact that I had to leave my family behind that was the hardest for my decision to serve a mission. Though we might not always see eye to eye with each other, each member of my family is someone I care deeply for, and I know that I could never live without. They bear me up, and give me more strength and support than I could ever hope to express in words.

I am ever thankful for the blessing of families. Certainly, there are no perfect families on earth. But if we model our lives after our Savior's, and model our family after that divine family from where we came from, we can at least bring ourselves close. We can feel of the love that our Father has for each of us, even when we do wrong. I remember very clearly growing up that I had a fear that if I made a mistake, even a minor one, I would lose the love my parents have for me. Now, nearing the age when I will start a family of my own, and looking back through the ages, I can see how foolish that thought was. Families should love, even when things go wrong and mistakes happen. For so loves our Father, the perfect example of love unfeigned.

This I state in humility, in the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.

-Elder Z.S.Weber

WEEK 98 - LOOKING FOR OTHER SEAS

Good Morning, friend, family, and other relative acquaintances! This is your favorite missionary from the Colorado Fort Collins Mission once again, the ever charismatic, charming, and completely humble Elder Z.S.Weber. It's great to hear from all y'all again. A lot has happened this past week, but before we get to all of that, may I just say that summer has officially come...and DANG! Is it hot or what?! I mean, seriously, this past week we saw the temperature gage on our car go up to 108 degrees! It was only for a few seconds, but DANG! That is hot! We're still expected to work in this infernal heat that has swept over the state, but worry not. Though the heat is great, the work has actually been pretty good here.

So, without further ado, let us begin!

To start us off, let's go back to Tuesday this past week. Now, some of you might remember that for the past few weeks, Elder Pember and I have been struggling in finding a new place for us to call home. Well, after searching and begging and pleading for a new home, we finally were able to move out of the McKenzies' and find a new place to call home. Where are we, you might ask? Well, because both Wards are still struggling in finding us a member that can house us, we have moved in with our Zone Leaders, Elder Fraser and Elder Jackson. This is my first time living with other Elders while on my mission. It's actually been pretty nice, as we all have studies together in the morning and have nice discussions. These discussions range from principles of the gospel, to who we think would win in an Avengers vs. Justice League, to possible date plans for after the mission.

Along with great studies and discussions with my friends, moving in with the Zone Leaders has proven to be good for me and my companion in more ways than I first thought. For starters, we live above-ground now, so when the sun rises at 5:45 in the morning it helps to wake us up at the right time. Also, every morning at 6:35, the Zone Leaders work out, having this huge six-day rolling plan set up to, as they say, 'get pumped!' So, pretty much every morning now we are working out...though we might not do the Zone Leader workout with them. I'm not saying that I can't do it, or that I won't do it...I'm just saying that I did their chest workouts on Thursday, and my right arm is still kind of sore...

Along with moving in, Elder Pember and I were able to get out and enjoy the warmth of the summer as we went out and tried to find some new investigators for the Prairie Ridge Ward. We have a pretty good teaching pool for Taft Canyon, and though things could be better there, the sad truth is we pretty much have nothing going on in Prairie Ridge. So, this week we dedicated ourselves to finding in the Prairie Ridge area. The work was slow, but enjoyable, as we mostly walked everywhere. Unfortunately, there weren't many people that were interested in talking with us. In fact, there were several occasions where we were walking down the sidewalk, saw someone walking towards us on the same walk, who then cut across the street to avoid talking to us. However, we were able to share a few short messages about the temple.

The best thing from this week, however, was our chance to finalize our plans for our investigator, Kathy Williams. Things have been really going well for her, and she is really excited for her baptism coming up. Wednesday, we were able to drag the District Leader over to our Church Building so that he could give Kathy her baptismal interview. Just as we had expected, she passed with flying colors. However, as we were setting up the program for her baptism with her, we found a few small problems. Nothing much, just that pretty much everyone that needs to be at her baptism (i.e. Ward Mission Leader, Relief Society President, Bishopric Member) would be out of town. So, we've moved her baptism from the 2nd to the 9th. Still, it's really exciting!

Well, that's how my week went! All in all, not all that shabby, if I do say so myself. Along with the work done, and the experiences...erm, experienced, this week has also been a great week of spiritual growth and enlightenment. Which means...It's time for another session of the Spiritual Thought!

This thought was inspired by a baptism that Elder Pember and I attended this last Saturday. After the woman had been baptized and had her short welcoming into the Ward, the Bishop had asked her to bear her testimony, or share about her journey to her baptism. While she said that she didn't have much of a testimony to share, as with most people who share their testimonies it was profound and beautiful, even as it was simple and sweet. As part of her testimony and journey towards baptism, she shared a song that her grandmother taught her when she was a young girl. Years later, she translated the song from Spanish to English, and it took on new meaning for her. With her permission, I include a verse of the translated song;

Lord, you looked into my eyes,

And smiling, you called my name.

In the sand, I left my boat.

With you, I will look for other seas.

(Pescadores de Hombres; lit. Fishers of Men)

This song refers to the story of Peter and his brethren. Peter was a fisherman in Galilee, and had dedicated his life to fishing. I'm certain that, though probably not the most profitable work to be invested in, it was a work he took much pride in and was pretty good at, if the patience he shows whenever he goes fishing in the New Testament is anything to go by. Yet even though he loved his work, there came a time when a different work called his name. The work he had previously done wasn't as successful or fulfilling as it was before, and I imagine he was looking for something more in his life. And that was when our Savior met him and extended the call to throw down his net and become a fisher of men. (Matthew 4:18-20)

Now, let's return to the woman who told me this song. At that time in her life, this young convert felt as though her faith based off of the Catholic Church was the boat in the song. It had fared her well throughout her life to there, yet she couldn't help but feel as though something was missing. Slowly, her nets stopped catching fish, her sails lost their wind, and her boat ended up stuck on the sandy shore. She needed something more in her life. She knew she wanted to follow and believe on Jesus Christ, but the faith she aligned herself with at that moment wasn't filling her needs as well as she had hoped. It was at that time that she decided to seek out her answers—seeking that eventually led her to the missionaries, and through them, God in His glory.

There may be some of you who read these messages that are struggling with your faith. You love God, and seek to follow Him at all times. Yet sometimes, you can't help but feel as though there is something lacking in your worship. Something is there, you know it, yet it is just beyond your reach. My counsel to you, my brothers and sisters in the spirit, is to ask your Father in Heaven what He would have you do. His desires are always good, and He knows best what is best for you. Perhaps He will give you strength to fortify your ship, new purpose within your ship. Or perhaps His counsel will be to set your net aside and "look for other seas." I cannot speak for you. All I can say is that I know that the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints truly is His restored church on the earth today. And if you choose to come and join us, we will welcome you with arms open wide as a brother or sister "who was lost, and is found." (Luke 15:32)

Now, for those of you my friends who are members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints and who struggle with your faith as well, may I direct your attention to the counsel of one of the apostles of the Lord? "At the beginning of [a river rafting trip], one of the experienced river guides reviewed important safety instructions, emphasizing three rules that would ensure the group’s safe travel through the rapids. 'Rule number one: stay in the boat! Rule number two: always wear a life jacket! Rule number three: always hold on with both hands!' He then said again, with even more emphasis, 'Above all, remember rule number one: stay in the boat!'" (M. Russell Ballard, Stay in the Boat and Hold On!, October 2014 General Conference)

There will be times in our lives when our seas get rough, when the storms are all about us and seeking to sink us into the depths of the ocean. At those times, there may be some among you who think it would be best to find a better boat to weather the storm in. My advice to you is—get away from that railing and stay in the boat! First of all, it's absolutely ridiculous to jump out of a ship in the middle of a storm, seeking for a larger vessel that may or may not be there. It's an entirely different situation if you can see the vessel, and it actually has a safety line thrown out for you before you've even jumped out into the waters (cough cough The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints), but that's not what we're talking about here.

Second, and I hate to burst bubbles here, but there is no better vessel to weather the storms of mortality in than the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints! It is the Lord's church, and He is the Master at the helm. With a man as perfect as He is, someone who has proven more than capable of calming the seas and the sailors time and again, why do you doubt? Let us stay in the boat, stay in this ship we call the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, and hold on with both hands. Though the waves may be fierce, and the force of the wind might cause us to fear for our lives, remember another group of Saints that feared a similar, yet more literal death. At that moment, the words of the Savior to them and the seas is the same counsel He gives each of us—"Peace, be still." (Mark 4:39)

This I pray in the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.

—Elder Z.S.Web

WEEK 97 - A FATHER INDEED

Good morning, fellow inhabitants of this beautiful world we all call Earth. Once more, this is your brilliant, charming, and ever-humble friend serving in the Colorado Fort Collins Mission, Elder Z.S.Weber. Once more, I am here to tell all y'all what's going on in my life as a missionary and what lessons I have been able to learn. Before I begin though, I realize that a lot of you might have been concerned with how...blue my last email sounded. Last week was really rough on me, and so I didn't really have the energy or conviction to write another powerful or inspiring message like I normally do. However, I can confidently say that this week turned out MUCH better than last week did, and I'm feeling much better as well.

So, what happened this week that made me feel so much better than the last? Well, to begin, on Tuesday we were asked to gather together for a Zone Conference. For the first time ever on my mission, we were actually going to a Zone Conference that was being held in our own Zone. Usually, because we share a Zone Conference with other Zones, the Zone I am in has to drive to the Zone that is hosting the Conference. The other interesting difference about this Zone Conference is that it was President Brown's last Zone Conference, and should be my last one as well. It's still kind of hard to believe that it's finally gotten this far, and that my mission is almost over. The fact that this was the last Zone Conference was a bit of a rude awakening.

For the most, the Zone Conference was spent as a Q&A session with President Brown. The President wanted to share as much advice as he could with us before his time as our Mission President ended. Surprisingly, there weren't any sarcastic questions asked, and though President Brown wasn't able to answer all of the questions, the questions he did answer I feel fit most of the missionaries that attended. Along with advice, President Brown talked with us missionaries about President McMurray, who should be coming to replace him by the middle of the first full week of July (1st through 7th). It was his hope that we would make serving with President McMurray easier on him, and that the exchange from one President to another wouldn't cause too much chaos in the mission.

After the meeting, we had a delicious lunch which had been prepared for us by some local members. After lunch was over, we each received these awesome little challenge/memory coins with the Fort Collins Mission emblem and the Fort Collins Temple on either side. 

It was a great gift to remember our mission from, especially for me, who accidentally lost his 'Armor of God' challenge coin at the very beginning of his mission and had missed the feeling of having a coin in his pocket. Finally, at the end of the meeting, we got to the Departing Testimonies, and boy were there a lot of them. There were nineteen missionaries that were going home in the next two months that were attending our Zone Conference, and from what President Brown said, about a quarter of the mission is going home in the first two months of President McMurray's mission. Ouch!

Among those that spoke were actually a lot of familiar faces. Elder Dixon, Elder Genther, Elder Christiansen, Elder Pratt and Elder Clavel, all from my original MTC group (43-Best!!), were there to give their departing testimonies. Elder NeVille, my former companion, was also there, as well as Elder Harper and Elder Clark, who I have previously served around, and Elder Tiai, who came out with me and was pretty much adopted by my MTC group. Elder Stock, Elder Farnes, and Elder Carter were all missionaries that came out with me, but weren't in my group, and Elder Marchetti and Elder Biggs were missionaries that are currently serving in the same Zone as me. This isn't all of the missionaries that said goodbye in that Zone Conference, but they're the ones that I know. It's crazy to think that I'm among them, and come forty-two days, I'll be homeward bound.

After the Zone Conference was over, and the week continued on, I had a few more moments in my week that I feel are worth mentioning. To start with, on Wednesday I got a chance to go on Exchanges with Elder Anderson, my former companion. I ended up going to his area, the Timberline Ward, and we did some work there. It was a good chance for me to see how the other missionaries are doing, and what trials they are going through. Because Timberline was swept out at Transfers, Elder Anderson and Elder Marchetti have a lot of weeding out to do without much direction. It made me glad that, though confusing it is to work two wards, we are able to handle and sort the work in our area. More than anything, though, it was nice just catching up with my former companion and seeing him again.

The next day, after we had exchanged back again, Elder Pember and I were able to have another chance to teach Kathy and Ralph Williams. By this point, we had pretty much finished teaching them all of the lessons, and Kathy by this point is pretty much all ready for her baptism. We went over a little earlier than normal to have dinner with them, and then we spent the rest of the night going over the Baptismal Interview questions so that she's ready for them come this next Thursday when she is actually being interviewed. Once that was done, we also answered any of her questions that she had for us, and stated once more to her that we were certain she was ready, and she herself bore testimony (which was awesome, by the way!) that she felt that she was ready.

So, yeah, that was my week! Way better than last week, am I right? We also have a great new Spiritual Message for all y'all, if you'd like to hear it. Surprisingly, this message has little to do with the Zone Conference or the lessons or exchanges that I've had this week. Rather, this message is one I would like to share about someone truly special and important in my life.

A few weeks ago, I shared a message based off of an article I read in the Ensign from several years back. In it, Elder Holland spoke of a young missionary coming home after a long season in the mission field. He spoke of his family that was waiting for him, but especially about "that big, slightly awkward, quiet, and bronzed giant of a man" who was his father, and who "ran out and swept his son into his arms." (Amazed at the Love Jesus Offers Me, Elder Jeffery R. Holland, New Era December 2008) As I have thought of that message, along with other stories such as the Prodigal Son, the messages Alma the Younger shares in chapters 36 to 42 in the Book of Alma, and the fact that yesterday was Father's Day, I feel impressed to share my own tribute to my father.

My dad, Steven James Weber, is a man that I have always looked up to. He can do almost anything, it seems, that he puts his mind to. He's run marathons, competed in triathlons, gone on hiking trips that I would faint at the thought of attempting, and always seems like he's eager for more. It was through my dad that I learned a lot of what makes me who I am. Sure, I'm a fantasy-type guy, but it was my dad who introduced me to Star Wars, who read Harry Potter to me at bedtime when I couldn't read it on my own. He was there to help me learn how to ride a bike, how to bike down a mountain, and how to ski down a mountain. He instilled in me a love of the outdoors and a love of football, things that don't usually go with being a nerd.

Beyond just passions and pastimes, though, it's because of my father that I'm where I am now spiritually. My dad has always been the spiritual leader of our family, a strong and stalwart bearer of the priesthood that I always looked up to. I remember very clearly on the day before the school year would start, Dad would spend a few hours by himself in his room, getting ready for the priesthood blessings he would be giving. He would then give four blessings in a row, each tailored to us kids in a way that transcended this mortal world. In my eyes, growing up, my dad was spiritual giant, and I longed to be able to stand as tall as he did. I didn't just want to know about the gospel, though I was very knowledgable as it was. I wanted to be an active member, using the gospel in my life like I saw in my father.

I've come a long way from then. I'm in no way perfect right now, and I know pretty well that I've still got a long road ahead of me. But I got a good start. I had a father that I could always look up to, someone who I could always respect. Though his example, I was able to truly come to know my Heavenly Father, and understand who He is and what He expects from me. And now, as I come to the end of my mission and start off on a new stage of my life, I know with upmost surety that I have the support of both of them behind me. I know I can turn to either for support and advice, and through their guidance and examples I can become who I am truly meant to be. I am so grateful to have these figures in my life, who have led me on to who I am now. Such is the same for all of us. Put your trust in your Father in Heaven, and He will always lead you to who you are meant to be.

This I bear witness of in the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.

—Elder Z.S.Weber